cream_and_custard

My mom does not want to live with her mom, but because of perceived financial insecurity, she let her live with her regardless.

Children have no financial means of their own, and she struggles with special needs, so even though much of our family hates her, our cousin lives with us regardless.

My mom and her husband do not want to live with me, I do not want to live with someone that does not want me, but the job market is poor, so I with with her regardless.



If our grandma had financial literacy, or more will, if the government gave more, they would not be living with someone that doesn't want them.

If the government gave young people universal basic income, and more help to people with special needs, she would not be living with someone that doesn't want her.

If the job market was well, if I had universal basic income, I would not be living with someone that does not want me.

The autumn months approach.

I have an Ai no Kusabi essay sitting in the back of my mind waiting to be turned into reality. I don't think I'll be able to write it on the computer, I've really taken to writing on paper.

I'm at the library right now, my brain is kind of fried from job applications and personal reading. Lord save my soul.

I want a girlfriend.

I like Twitter, but it does feel overly "try-hard" to post extremely long shit there, so I return.

I want to create art that others and myself feel a desire to return too.
I've created so much thoughtless art, and held myself back from increasing my abilities.

Right now I'm returning to watercolor.
At Walmart I picked up a little watercolor memo for small, casual practice, that has more of a focus on learning to use color rather then having good form, lines or anything else.

Subject matter is important, but only in so far as how I can enhance it/tie it into the color choices.


I still like drawing people, but I feel that really limits what I can express. I want to draw more backgrounds, buildings, interiors, and abstract art.
In particular, I'm very interested in cluttered abstract/surrealist art that expresses frenzy and high energy. I'm interested in composition.

As for viewing other's "cluttered" art, I think am better at taking it in and creating a "whole" feeling informed by all pieces rather than being overly focused on any singular element. I think this density of information is extremely powerful and would like to be able to create works like that myself. I think symbolism is very useful for achieving this affect due to their density of meaning that literal objects might not be able to convey as easily, especially in pieces lacking a larger text.

I'm feeling really excited. I'm not sure what I want to do. I know I have some art on the backburner that I'm feeling a little more inclined to finish, but after that, what? I'm really not sure. I'm not sure at all!

I think reading art history and thinking about all the differing intentions that people can approach art with has helped me to be a little less insecure about making art that isn't a direct "expression" of myself. I think a bit of detachment is healthy for me and helps me to make choices that are more thoughtful <3

I feel like this entire train of thought is a little incomplete, as I have no idea where I want to go...but I think that's okay! I want to figure out where I want to go!!! I want to know!! I think that path is surrealism and more Buck-Tick fanart, but we'll see...


それでは...adieu!!! (｡･ω･)ﾉﾞ

I really the dry air right now. I feel constantly dehydrated and shit. My skin in physically uncomfortable to rub against. Dry mouth, dry nose, dry skin. It makes me feel like I'm always on the edge of getting sick lmao.

Is there anyone else on this earth as obsessed with Caste Heaven as me? I haven't read it in full, and I haven't even read it carefully, but I've reread/Jacked-off to the first half a million times at this point since mid highschool.

The art is so sharp and erotic, the context and unequal relationships, the way they have to hide it all. I'm horrendously obsessed with the feeling and the atmosphere it creates. I love to ephemeral nature of it all. The moment they leave highschool, this entire arbitrary system they've create will mean nothing. OHH god, it's so great.

It's been grey and rainy out lately. I love this type of weather and I like that it matched my mood.

When it's too bright all the time, it makes me feel like I'm wasting my days. Not fully appreciating the nice weather.

So thank god.

Cross posted from my community green_joy


Hello everyone. I urge you all to view this website.

There mission as stated in their about section is

...to foster international cooperation to accelerate a transition to renewable energy for everyone, end the expansion of coal, oil and gas, and equitably phase out existing production...

I my self have already written to my local Executive and Governor about using their template,

Even if it's not this organization specifically (thought I think organizing under one label is helpful) I really would urge everyone to post about supporting an end to the use of fossil fuels where ever you can. I think small actions are good, but I believe our situation is urgent enough that it requires large political change, and that's much harder to achieve when people are unaware and there is no strong push for this change.

If you do post about it, please do tell me in the comments if you like, I would love to know!


Splintering off, I would just like to say, I for the remaining part of the year, would like to put my all in to political and social work for environmentalism. I ride my bike when I can, I try to compost, but I don't believe my individual actions, without change from wider society will help us. So I want to do the most I can!

I can't stand most modern work because it feels senseless.

We know over consumption is bad for us, it's bad for out health, and yet we do it anyways.

Forced to stand up straight and presentable to a room full of no one, just in case there ever is someone.

We know single use items are wasteful, but we won't stop, no matter what.

I'm expected to feel respect towards a room owned by a faceless, child slave using company. Don't they know where respect lies? How can I feel happy here?

Forced to take abuse that's senseless. I never hurt these people, but a normal response is a firable response. A rationable response is managed away.

A wedding is huge in our culture, a wedding for your parent ought to be humongous in emotional weight, but they'd rather a needlessly upset worker, who will hate you forever afterwards, and quit soon, then allow a day off, because there is no emotional logic allowed, despite having just as real an affect. You can't put emotions on the paper, you can never be fully sure you're faceless employee is telling the telling the truth, so no room will ever be given to the real lives that actually do the work. Who the work is meant for humans.

So little of the work we do is actually in service of ourselves, but for papers and number that don't need our care. So I feel sick and I job hop, because I'm being disregarded. I feel worn down doing work for no one. Doing work for paper and numbers.

These IDIOTS on twitter misinterpreting my plight are a reminder that twitter is only for light fun with friends, not debating fucking idiots that think my heart is withered out or whatever. I should just stay private ah...

Idk much about denpa but has anyone written about connections between dadaism and denpa music?